The Honest Gardener
By Alison Hooper
Embrace Your Gardening GoblinIt was put to a public vote (and what could possibly go wrong with one of those?) and the winner of the OED’s 2022 Word of the Year award turned out to be ‘goblin mode’. Sashaying across the English language’s catwalk in its crackling polyester’s winner’s ribbon, ‘goblin mode’ elbowed aside its competitors: ‘metaverse’ and ‘#IStandWith’ to claim the glittering tiara. Except, nobody’s ever really heard of it have they? Let alone used it casually in day-to-day conversation. Allusions of a possible PR stunt aside, we can kind of guess what it means and understand its sense of self-indulgent crawling inside of a cosy cave, indifferent to social expectations of what we should be doing. Part of me very much likes that. Yes, I see your adverts for teeth whitening, beautifying kits and insistent demands that unless we go out on the town in high heels and no overcoats, but I’m good here thanks, just me and my heated throw and a cheeky afternoon nap penciled in. If we can’t be a bit goblin-like during winter, when can we be?
So, when I see professional gardeners (as opposed to the have-a-go kind like me) out and about in all weathers, shears brandished, and setting about the pruning of rose bushes, ripping out deep-rooted weeds, as we are advised to at this point in the gardening calendar, it is all too easy to want to shut the curtains, goblin-like, and resolve to go outside again once the great outdoors isn’t feeling quite so brutal. So, what can we mere mortals be doing during midwinter? Well, lots really. Even if we’re not spending quite so much time outside, we can at least feed the garden birds now the weather is getting colder and ground conditions harder and icier. Any plans to replant parts of the garden can include adding some berrying trees and shrubs to encourage birds, or even a water feature which will attract an even greater variety of wildlife. If you’re lucky enough to have a greenhouse or conservatory you may well already be considering installing some insulation to help reduce the costs of heating, a useful financial side-bonus your plants will also thank you for. Much of winter’s work involves good old-fashioned hard graft: pruning back overgrown hedges, cutting back roses and fruit bushes, lifting and dividing, repairing and maintaining tools and turf as well as day-to-day tasks like shaking off any heavy snow from plants and structures if we do get any heavy snowfalls. Chances are that even doing some moderate light activity in the garden will reduce stress and increase our general wellbeing. And if that still doesn’t quite appeal enough, the very pleasant business of armchair gardening can’t go unrecommended. Settling in, maybe next to a nice fire or under a warm blanket, leafing through seed catalogues, planning it all out for the year to come. And let’s not forget about watering our houseplants, our daily oasis of green when skies are grey. If you’re really lucky and have children who take an interest, this could even be a job for them. Being a goblin never felt so virtuous. Happy New Year! |
Issue 16
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